ITs confirmed- she is a monster !

Well we took Kayden to the dentist for the first time. She got her bottom tooth and now it appeared that her fangs were popping through. So I was concerned about the rest of the front teeth and I read that for special needs kiddo it is good to have them checked by the dentist around their first birthday as preventative. And since everything that could go wrong has, we decided to go ahead and have her checked. Out dentist is amazing- I already knew that with Caitlin ! but his staff arranged an appt that was at a time that is more quiet and set in a room with less stimulation. Kayden feel asleep right as we pulled into the parking lot and started to wake up when the Dr came in the room. He checked her out and told us the following..... Her muscle tone is good (YEAH !! Huge relief so she shouldnt have problems with speech) and her pallet is good (YEAH gain !), he feels her teeth and everything seems good. He said that there is nothing wrong with her fangs coming in before her front teeth, even though thats not the "norm" it does happen and she will just look like a vampire ! At which I corrected him, reminding him she already has one in the front bottom and said it will be more like a jack-o-lantern. To which he said "how we know what she will be for halloween" Except lil punkin was a punkin last year- she was going to be a lady bug this year !! The only concern was that he did not see the teeth next to the top front teeth. He said the could be delayed and be there and him just not be be able to feel them, but he did talk to us about the possibilities they are missing ! They wont do too much for baby teeth but if the big teeth are gone too then they will need to do some adjustments. We will cross that bridge when we get there !!! Kayden did great through the whole thing and never got upset with him poking and pushing in her mouth, in fact she even smiled about it. I wish I could post the pics but they are on our phones and Im not sure to get them from there to here ! He also told me 1. they are recommending the preventative vistis around age 1 for all kids, 2. watch the amount of juice she gets so it does not lead to cavities, and at age 2 he wants her on a straw sippy cup ! and he wants to see us again in 6 months ! This was one of the BEST Doctor visits we had in a long time. We didnt walk out feeling "great, one more thing" We feel good to know that her front teeth are there and that its okay for her canines to come in frist ! WHEW ! What a relief ! and she got to go home with a soft baby tooth brush so we can start introducing teeth bruching ! awwww her first tooth brush ! My baby is growing up !

You had to know it was coming

If you know me, you know that I competed in beauty pageants ! Including Miss Texas USA ! Loved it and the confidence it gave me as well as the stage presence and ability to get in front of groups. I know everyone has their opinions of pageants (especially children pageants) but since this is MY blog, mine is the one that gets posted ! I put Caitlin in pageants starting at 4 months old. this has been a very positive experience for both of us and it has been very positive for Caitlin. So you had to know that at some point Kayden would get to do one too !! Well that some day came this past Saturday ! I wasnt sure how she would do because when she sees someone new she just stares at them and doesnt even smile, so I was a little worried how she would do in front of everyone. Well I had nothing to worry about ! She got on the stage and smiled like there was no tomorrow and "we" blew kisses and then she talked to the judges !! Her personality really came through and she won her age division !!! Here are the pics !

What do you say ?????

One thing that has been a positive of Kayden having special needs to getting to know other families of special needs children. It has allowed me to be exposed to things outside my bubble that I never would have before. I found out that babies can have strokes before they are ever born, I have learned how unfair life can be, how others deal with issues have have been able to learn from it. But this is the first time I have had to deal with this.........

A few months ago I meet a mom here in town who had started an organization (www.coopersquest.org) named for her son who was diagnosed at 10months with a genetic disease. We had talked back and forth and compared notes and talked about getting together to talk the kiddos for a walk, and then I hadnt heard from her, until friday when I got this email........
"Hi Mara.
I'm sorry that its been awhile since the last email. Cooper's disease progressed very rapidly in June...it was a really hard month for us. Cooper passed away on July 8 and I have been on a leave of absence...I'm just now getting around to emails. I think about you & your family all the time. I would still love to meet you sometime and just be able to talk in person.
I hope everyone is doing well."

what do you say back ??????
That Kayden is improving and doing really well ??
I was heartbroken....
I cried, and cried, and cried
and then I went home to hug my children

change of heart

Today was going to be the day I got off my butt and quit putting things on hold. and then I read the blogs I follow, and my heart sunk. Little Zoey who has been through so much- DS, heart surgery, seizures, Lukemia, and has been through the treatments for the cancer, may be in remission. I already lost my friend Johnny to the same Cancer. How can life be so unfair to this little girl ? to her family ? what did they do to deserve this ? To think this cancer could take this childs life has left me in tears. It has drained my motivation for the day. It makes me appreciate my own situation so much better. It makes me want to go home and hug my daughter for everything she doesnt have (instead of thinking about everything we have been through this past year). I so dont understand life. I dont understand how things like this can happen. All I can do is pray this little girl will be okay. Although at this point I dont believe much in prayer anymore.

making it private....

after careful consideration- I am looking at making my blog private.....

so, if you read it, PLEASE let me now so I can send you an invite before making it totally private

thanks

I'll show you my scar if you show me yours....

Kayden's first time on the beach

Kayden getting to meet her great grandmother

Kayden getting to meet Dylan

They got along together great ...hehe

When we were preparing for Kayden's surgery, Wonderful Jeanette showed me a blog about a baby who had just had heart surgery. His name is Dylan and his wonderful Mommy Laurie did a great job of posting pics and sharing his progress on his surgery. It really helped me to prepare and know what to expect with Kayden's surgery and it made all the difference when we had ours.I know Laurie lived in Mass. so.....

We went this past week to Boston. My grandmother turns 91 and her health is failing. It may be the last time we get to see her, but more importantly it maybe Kayden's time to meet her.

When I knew we were going to go, I got in touch with Laurie and she only lives about 30 minutes from my dad so we got to meet them in person.

Dyan and Kayden hit it off right away, see for your self !!!!

Way behind

Kayden opening her presents
Kayden's special guest winnie the pooh !!!

Kayden eating her cake at her party
Kayden's cake mommy made her
Kayden on her actual birthday with another cake......

I am so behind. things have been so busy and blogging has been on the bottom of the list...
Kayden turned one July 4th !!!! YEAH ! What a year it has been, and looking back everything seems so long ago... the stay in the NICU, the heart surgery.........
she is just excelling so well and her personality is coming out so much !
So here are her birthday pics......